In this dating advice tips article, you’ll discover that men and women are very different in their approach to dating and what they want to get out of a date and even how they communicate.
Relationship expert Ato Hedda Muskat in post date interviews, claims that men generally concentrate on the physical aspects of the woman, while women generally concentrate on the financial aspects of the man.
What Men Say
For there to be any kind of relationship, a man must be physically attracted to the woman he’s dating. In this respect men are pretty shallow. But the good news is that they also admit that they are that shallow for the most part.
To get a man’s attention, all a woman has to do is look good.
Men don’t like to talk much, and certainly NOT about their feelings. However, if you get them talking about sex or themselves, you can’t shut them up.
As a result, men tend to keep things bottled up inside and bring them out at what seems to be the most inappropriate times – like after sex or during some intimate moment.
Here are some real life examples of what men say about women in post date interviews (conducted by Hedda):
Her butt was so big it could stop a Mack truck.”
“Aren’t Flashdance fashions out of style?”
“She had a great body, but a horse’s face.”
“She had a great face, but a horse’s ass.”
Here are some more real life examples of what men say to each other about women:
“I didn’t want to tell her but those pants made her look fat.”
“Damn her friend is hot.”
“She’s more like a sister to me.”
“I’d like to see her without her glasses.”
“She just wouldn’t shut up.”
”I didn’t feel like we were dating anyway.”
While some of these comments (most) are pretty mean, you can see a common thread – men are more physically oriented.
It doesn’t necessarily indicate that men are sexist pigs however.
Its important to understand that men socialize by insulting each other. So insults come naturally – almost genetically to them. But they don’t really mean the insults.
What Women Say
Women are much more financially oriented.
Even though a woman can be highly attracted to a man, appreciating his physical attributes, if the guy has no money – there isn’t much chance for a second date or for the relationship to go anywhere.
One of the biggest turn offs for a woman is the amount of money a man makes.
It doesn’t really matter where the guy works, or what he does for a living, what matters is the amount of money he makes doing it.
According to post date interviews with women, Hedda claims that women don’t want to hear men say:
“I’m still working at 7-11 but I want to be an actor.”
“Do you have money for the meter?”
“I picked these out of your neighbor’s garden.”
In other words, there has to be potential for the man to be making a lot of money either now or in the future.
The (good?) news is that women will often overlook a man’s shortcomings if he is:
rolled in medical school
Enrolled in law school
Is starting a new business
Inherits or comes from money
Just won the lottery
Upon closer examination it looks like women in general seem to have their own language.
For example, here are some real life samples of what women say to men just to push their buttons. Notice the hidden language associated with each question or statement:
“We’re not having sex tonight.”
“Do you think she’s pretty?”
“I just want to be friends.”
“You’re a player.”
“I have a boyfriend.”
“That looks cute.”
“We need to talk.”
“I’ll just have a salad.”
“Do I look fat?”
“You should work out more.”
And worse, women feel like they constantly have to compete with each other – whether or not they really want the man or not.
And they’ll do what it takes to win.
One of the biggest complaints men have about women on a first date is that they talk too much and don’t say anything.
A woman can talk about how many children she wants, what her dream home is like, what kind of wedding dress she wants, what kind of car her guy should drive, how he should dress and so on.
And like men, women socialize by giving each other compliments that they don’t really mean. Some of those spill over when talking to men.
What’s the Bottom Line?
Women consider the man’s approach to be sexist while men consider the woman’s approach to be gold-digging or mercenary.
And the truth is that men and women each speak a different language. What they say about each other, and to each other, can be loaded with unintended insult, double meaning, and hidden mines.
As many men and women have discovered, learning the ‘language’ of the opposite sex can be a lifetime endeavor.