Olestra Lightning!

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Tim Penner

In all the hubbub of launching the Plane Crazy Web site, I've forgotten that Plane Crazy isn't my first stage show!

About a million years ago, when I worked at Procter & Gamble, a group of us long-haired creative types decided to "Old Spice up" the fall dinner dance with an employee stage show.

What started out as a small talent show quickly blossomed into a full-fledged musical revue called Fiscal Follies (insert groan here). I was one of the writers who took well-known songs and wrote new, P&G relevant lyrics.

I also performed in the show, singing and dancing in the final number (dressed in black tights and a tuxedo jacket -- how incredibly professional!) which was the Michael Jackson song "Man in the Mirror", but rewritten to inspire organizational change.


Man in the Mirror

We even had the president of P&G at the time, Doug Grindstaff, come up on stage to join with me to say "Make That Change!" (insert groan here).

But my two favorite numbers, which I wrote, were "Summer Intern" about summer business school interns sung to the tune of "Summer Lovin'" from Grease, and "Olestra Lightning", about P&G's new fat substitute, sung to the tune of "Greased Lightning", also from Grease (duh).

What made the former special was that I sang it, but what made the latter even more special was that two senior managers, Tim Penner and Mike Kehoe, sang it -- dressed as '50s greasers. Tim Penner has gone on to become the President of P&G Canada (27 years with the company -- Wow!). Mike Kehoe has also gone on to fame and fortune as the leader of the Crest White Strips introduction.

Actually what brought this all back to me was when I saw a big pic of Tim in the business section of the The Globe and Mail last week, costumed up for P&G's Cultural Diversity Day. Yikes...I was soooooooo not right for P&G: I can't believe I lasted four years. And I've been a full-time songwriter ever since I left.

To top it off we videotaped the entire Fiscal Follies and I still have the videotape. I'm prepared to sell the last remaining copy of this incriminating tape to the highest bidder...eBay here I come!

By Suzy Conn on April 15, 2005 9:12 AM | | Comments (0)


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